By her own counting, Larissa was already in the ninth month of her pregnancy, so she finally decided to see her gynecologist. By that point, she could barely walk because her belly was huge. She wanted the check-up to be quick because she already knew everything about giving birth, so she thought the gynecologist wouldn’t bother with such info.
The exam began, and it was routine at first. But then the ultrasound screen lit up. Larissa was overly excited to finally see the familiar shape of a baby. But then, the doctor’s face changed. He took yet another look at the screen and then said, “Mrs. Larissa… that isn’t a baby.”
Her heart jumped. “Then what is it?”
The doctor then explained, “You have a lithopedion. It’s extremely rare. It happens when an ectopic pregnancy calcifies inside your body. Your body protected itself by turning the fetus to stone. This probably happened decades ago, and only now is it causing symptoms.”
For a moment, the room leaned over her. All this time, something had been inside of her without her even realizing it. The weight and the small movements she was sure she sensed were not a baby at all but the lingering left-over effects of something that long ago quietly died out in her body.
She didn’t cry out, didn’t cry at all. She just stood there, taking in the news. It was a sense of relief, of shock, but she couldn’t even think of a word for it. Larissa had thought of a baby, had even considered what to name it, made little socks for it. But then, everything changed. It turns out, her body had been dealing with all this behind the scenes all along.
Then came the surgery. It wasn’t an easy one,but doctors assured her she was in safe hands.
As she awoke, she felt lighter than she had in ages. At that moment she was not sad or overwhelmed, just free. A weight she had never been aware of was lifted off her shoulders.
The following weeks, Larissa couldn’t help but think about everything that had gone on. Think about the little socks, the crib, the names she considered naming her baby. Think about all of that as a way of hope, of dreaming, of loving. But all of that hadn’t been for any of that. None of that. She didn’t feel any of those things. She just felt grateful. Her body had been holding a secret for decades, and now she was free.
She began walking more, noticing she felt light on her feet. Her neighbors certainly noticed the change too. “You look happier,” they would comment to her. Her smile and nod said all she had to say, as she had no need to explain herself. Her story, after all, was hers to keep alone.
She recalled all those weeks she had spent thinking of a reality that did not exist.
Continue on next page
Leave a Comment